Life so far

So life has been hectic since coming back to NGU. The last month probably has been the most spiritually stressing. Here is a list of why:

1. My roommate and I who were once best friends rarely speak.
2. I have struggled with having a consistant quiet time....
3. Because of #2 I feel so far away from God.
4. The position I was looking forward to after graduation has fallen through
5. I don't know where God is leading me now
6. I feel alone and lost so many days
7. Questioning why I am here at NGU
8. Wondering when God is going to provide a man to come alongside me.

Okay so there are 8 things... It's just been a questioning time for me lately. God did give me the spiritual peace before my position fell through, but my fleshly side keeps reminding me of it.

I know God has a plan for me I just hate waiting... Heck I hate waiting in line at Wal-Mart or in a drive through, you know I hate waiting for what is going to happen for my future. As a child I wanted to have those TV moments where I just wanted to wake up and that time is my life be over. I desire for that to happen now. I am in such a funk when it comes to school and life... truthfully I could care less at this point about anything other than my family. I will say that God has made my family more of a priority lately than they have been in my life. I desire to go to every game my litte cousin plays in. Even though I don't know why things happen, I'm still gonna rely on the Lord!!!